Oh what thoughts do fill my mind
Your face displayed and locked in time
I hear your voice inside my heart
What went wrong… so long apart?
Throughout the years I’ve thought of you
Times we shared..what we went through
The memories flow in random paths
Your gentle touch… and how you laughed
So much time has come and gone
Still your presence… lingers on
What if time could now be changed?
What would life be… re-arranged?
Nothing ever stays the same
Can’t go back and love reclaim
I hope your dreams they all came true
some did for me, but not with you
some did for me, but not with you
© Jon Arno
Beautiful Jon!
ReplyDeleteThis piece touched a chord deep within me. It was as if you looked into my very soul and copied what was written there. I love the way it flowed. The questions and the pauses only added to the beauty. I really enjoyed this. Thanks for bringing this to the world.....
ReplyDeleteTITLE: Fits the content well.
ReplyDeleteIMAGERY: Good and vivid.
The character is looking at a past relationship and wishing it were able to turn back the time.
The memories are still rich and linger inside.
We know it's not possible to change anything so we must accept that and move on.
That doesn't mean we can't still feel love or regret.
EMOTIONAL CHORD STRUCK:
Sometime the memories will just pop up out of nowhere and make us sad.
Sometimes that will come in the night and make us quietly cry.
None the less we are who we are now.
A bitter pill to take to say the least.
TONE: Good depth of feelings. A sad piece about life yet true.
SPELLING ERRORS:None found.
FLOW: Flow is good. The word choice is good
OVERALL: Good read. Please keep sharing.
....speechless! such a way with the wording in this one! esp. love these two lines "What if time could now be changed? What would life be… re-arranged?" it struck a chord thats for sure
ReplyDeleteCaptivating emotions run through this read and is very moving. I could feel your love for her pour off the page. You are an awesome poet and have so much potential. Million thx for sharing! May God Bless you and yours....
ReplyDeletewhat a beautiful memory, Jon. Did she ever see the poem? I have a few memories of those long ago loves! This is one of your best poems!
ReplyDeleteThis is so good Jon, such heartfelt sentiment, she must have been truly the one. love to read poets first on soup, not disappointed. Happy new year. harry
ReplyDeleteAcceptance of what is can't heal the hurt of what has happened. Your last verse says so much .........
ReplyDeleteWishing you a wonderful day and weekend too. I enjoyed reading your poetry this morning Jon. I hope your weekend is filled with love and joy and you find your soul filled with inspiration. Love, Carol
ReplyDeleteIt is good to remember the good times. It is the best one can do when we experience loss. But it sure is not going to be forgotten. A great write! Thanks for sharing. Caroline.
ReplyDeleteLynda Ferrer True ..happy moments in the past seldon come back and not the same
ReplyDelete41 minutes ago · Like
Debbie Williams Armstrong so soft and yet so profound
ReplyDeleteabout an hour ago
Margaret Gudkov Soft gentle ellegy love was there but now just bittersweet memory
ReplyDeleteJ UnitedPoets AndArtists Nothing like a lost love to get to feeling "what if" .. Excellent write.
ReplyDelete3 minutes ago · Like
Date: 3/13/2012 6:20:00 PM
ReplyDeleteHi Jon, How are you? Thought I'd go to the rear end of you poetry list and check out what you wrote. Never disappointed as this is another lovely creation; always gantly spoken with that touch of sadness. Luv, Lizabeth
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